forward

it appears that my soon to be ex is willing to settle with me on the custody issues we've been having.
the whole thing seems a little suspect to me though.
he has fought me for weeks on the split custody but now he gives in?
says he wants us to be friends and is scared that if we go to court that won't happen.
i find this amusing because that's been my point all along.
us remaining friends, best friends, is all i've ever wanted.
i've told him this all along and he continued to use custody as a way to drag this out.
now he says he's "ready to move on".
guess i will take it for what it is- a settlement.

i think we are both excited about what the futures holds.
excited of the new possibilities.
excited about a new beginning.
excited about dedicating time we use to spend attempting to salvage our marriage on raising our son together.

at the same time, i am sad.
sad that i no longer have that one person to call if i get a flat tire
if i get sick and can't get out of bed
sad that i am no longer anyone's ‘favorite’
not that i ever felt like his favorite or anything though
not sure why it matters now- maybe because it is so final.

i feel blessed in many other ways though
i will focus on that
my son and i are healthy
i have incredible friends
my family is supportive
my faith is stronger than ever
and....i feel my self-confidence returning